Yet I Dare To Hope

Today is one of the most important days in the year: my birthday.

 

Every single year I have hoped for snow on my birthday and every single year I have been disappointed.  There is often snow in other places in the country, or snow in the weeks just after my birthday, but I have yet to enjoy snow on my actual birthday.

 

However, despite the fact that I have yet to enjoy snow on my birthday, despite the years of disappointment, every single year I still hope that it might just snow.  I eagerly watch the weather forecasts, I wake up during the night before my birthday just to check outside.  Even now, with a few hours left of my birthday, I think it might just snow.  There's still a chance.

 

Despite the disappointment, I still dare to hope.

 

And it's a tiny, pale, weak reflection of what the writer of Lamentations described in the Bible.  The book of Lamentations, as the name suggests, is a book of mourning at the destruction and desolation of Jerusalem.

 

And yet, in the very middle of the book, there is a tiny seed of hope.  A moment where, despite the dire circumstances, the writer remembers God's goodness.  And it gives him cause to hope.

 

      "The thought of my suffering and homelessness
      is bitter beyond words.

      I will never forget this awful time,
      as I grieve over my loss.
      Yet I still dare to hope
      when I remember this:

      The faithful love of the Lord never ends!
      His mercies never cease.
      Great is his faithfulness;
      his mercies begin afresh each morning.
      I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance;
      therefore, I will hope in him!”

      The Lord is good to those who depend on him,
      to those who search for him.
      So it is good to wait quietly
      for salvation from the Lord."

 

     [Lamentations 3:19-26 NLT, emphasis mine]

 

 

Yet I still dare to hope.

 

Despite difficult circumstances, despite repeated disappointments, despite broken dreams, still I dare to hope when I remember who it is that I trust. 

 

We can continue to hope, because we can put our hope and trust in a faithful, loving, merciful God.

 

And as for the snow, there's always next year.

 

 

 

What Do I Really Want?

I always find it difficult compiling a list of suggested presents for my birthday or Christmas.  Not because I can't think of things, but because I can think of too many things and I feel the need to narrow the list down, so as not to look too greedy.

 

It is easy to make a long list of all sorts of frivolous things that I would like. Things which would feel like a treat, because I don't really need them but they're pretty. Or things which I do need, but can't really afford.

 

I find myself asking What do I really want?  

 

Jesus asks us the same thing.

 

John recounts how John the Baptist's followers saw Jesus one day and started following him.

 

"Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, 'What do you want?'”

[John 1:38 NIV]

 

And He asks us the same thing.  What do you want?

To know He exists?  To know He cares?  To know forgiveness?  To be able to forgive?  To feel loved?  To have a new job, or a new car, or a new house?  To have more money?  To move beyond just surviving?

 

Often, we don't know what we really want.  Or we don't want to admit what we really want.  Especially as Christians - sometimes our 'wants' can seem not 'Christian' enough. 

But Jesus sees into the heart of things and He wants us to share our dreams and our desires with Him, regardless of how 'Christian' they might seem.

 

Paul urges us to share our whole hearts with God:

 

"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done."

[Philippians 4:6 NLT]

 

So, what do you really want?

 

 

 

Presents and Presence

As Christmas creeps on to the horizon (and, more importantly, my birthday), thoughts turn to presents.

 

You have perhaps seen the play on words in wedding or birthday invitations: It's your presence we want, not your presents.*  Or No presents thanks, it's your presence that counts!

 

There is something powerful and significant about our presence - about being present in a situation.  Not just being there in person, whilst our hearts or minds are distracted.  But being really present.

 

When we are really present, we can connect with people properly.  We are completely focused on them.  We can listen to what they're saying and what they're not saying, but longing for us to hear. 

 

When we are really present, we share something of ourselves with others.

 

It's the same with the presence of God, too.

 

When we enter His presence, we learn something of who He is. 

 

I have had the words of two songs about being in God's presence on my heart for the last few days.

 

The first is 'I Love Your Presence':

 

         "In the glory of Your presence
         I find rest for my soul
         In the depths of Your love
         I find peace
         Makes me whole

         I love, I love, I love Your presence
         I love, I love, I love Your presence
         I love, I love, I love You Jesus
         I love, I love, I love Your presence."

 

And the second is from 'Set a Fire' by United Pursuit Band:

       "No place I would rather be,

       No place I would rather be,

       No place I would rather be,

       Than here in your love,

       Here in your love."

 

This desire to be in God's presence is something that David understood.

 

        "The one thing I ask of the Lord —
        the thing I seek most—
        is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
        delighting in the Lord's perfections
        and meditating in his Temple."

 

       [Psalm 27:4 NLT]

 

Is this really the one thing I want?  The one thing I desire?  Is it the thing I seek the most?  Is there really no place I would rather be?

 

I'm not sure.  Probably not.  But I want to want it to be.  For it is in God's presence that we find rest for our souls and peace that makes us whole.

 

It is in God's presence that we find ourselves. 

 

 

 

 

*FYI This doesn't swing with me, I'm much more of a presents girl.